Monday, March 23, 2009

You can fill the BLANK in...

My homie just emailed me this.. They're usually lame but I'm bored so Ima go in..

1. My ex... is FUNNY! reality tv funny lol (why did that have to be first haha)

2. Maybe I should... make a pb&j, I love those.

3. I love ... my CHURCH. It's definitely the dopest/realest church in alll thee land lol.

4. People would say that I am... dope, fun, inteligent. I also know others probably would have more negative things to say.

5. I don't understand... this world. I know thats a broad statement, but I dont. A lot of the things that happen in and around my world are verrryyy mystery to me.

6. When I wake up in the morning... I can't see anything for about 3 minutes, I think I need glasses lol.

7. I lost... the dopest FUBU jacket ever when I was in 5th grade..I was SICK for weeks!

8. Life is full of... mysteries and questions. Walk your path to figure them out.

9. My past... is my past. Don't judge me man!

10. I get annoyed when... I introduce someone to something new, and then later on they try to tell me about it, like I wasn't the one who told them about it! What is that about??? I don't even want credit, but just be REAL.

11. Parties are... cool, I guess.

12. I wish... everyone in the world could be in a relationship with the person that was put here for them without going through a million other people. Extreme? Yea, but oh well its my wish!

13. Dogs... are real! I miss my late pup PUMA, RIP homie! Ima get another one when I get my own spot this summer.

14. Cats... are very weak and sneaky. I'm cool!

15. Tomorrow... Let's not discuss tomorrow. I still have a lot more to do today. Plus tomorrow is not promised.

16. I have low tolerance... for people with ulterior motives. I usually can spot this person early on, but if not, once I find out, its a wrap. I think thats extremely selfish and I'm cool on that too.

17. If I had a million dollars.. I'd give 10% to God. Then I'd spread atleast 300k between my family and CLOSE friends (some people would be sick). The rest would be mine, and I would flip it over and over between business ventures and other ideas I have.

18. I'm totally terrified of... not reaching the promises that have been made for my life.

19. My spouse... will be my bestfriend, my heart, my soulmate. Can't wait until you stop playing and come find me (maybe its the other way around lol).. But anyways, We're gonna wreckshop together, on some Martin and Corretta, Will and Jada, Magic and Cookie type stuff lmao.

20. My life... is full of blessings, ups and downs. But I love it. I'm living a movie!

SO yeaa I actually enjoyed this.. Lol

Thursday, March 19, 2009

ESPN Commercials.. Funny!

Its only right that thee dopest channel on the planet, has thee dopest commercials right? RIGHT. ESPN never disappoints when it comes to their classic commercials. Whenever I'm up late and I see any one of their commercials I get hyped. Its just instant gratification lol. But yea enough rambling.... ENJOY

Tuesday, March 17, 2009


Lately channels 60-65 have been getting a lot of action on my cable box (Time Warner). This is probably my 2nd favorite time of the year, after Jesus' birthday. The NCAA Tournament aka MARCH MADNESS is here! Ahhhhh yesss I love it. I'm ready to see the upsets, cinderella stories, and everything else the game brings. Just listening to the ESPN analyst make predictions and give info on the games to come this week has been satisfying enough, but I must admit, I'm ready to see games. I already did my bracket and I'm pretty sure the teams I have in the Final Four will be there, BUT you never know! And that's the beauty of it.

God bless and shout outs to ALL my bros who made the tournament this year. Marcus Johnson, USC. Mark Hill, Cal State Northridge. Dash Harris, Texas A&M. Patrick Christopher, Cal. Justin Thomas, Syracuse. Isiah Thomas, Washington. Workout fellas!

My Beginning

I was at the beginning, freshly starting on my way. The setting was dark, and I'll admit I was slightly frightened of what lay ahead. All I could see was the road that precedeth me, never be able to see the end, just pavement upon pavement stretching as far as my eyes could see. I paused before I began, taking in the largest breath possible, knowing this wouldn't be easy, but believing that I'd reach my destination; that which was my destination in this life. So I started on my way. As I'm walking and observing my course, learning much along the way, stopping often for many different reasons. There were people whose destination road collided with mine for a time, most seperating when the roads got bumpy, but secretly I was infamous for taking a detour or two, seperating myself. Situation after situation, instance after instance, I just walked. I don't remember everything though, mostly on purpose, memories seem to fade and honestly there are things I just rather not remember. Despite some ill feelings of the past, it was along this road where I discovered me. I located my self worth, along with my dignity and my passions. A few instances did stand out though. There was one time in particular, it was in the middle of the beginning and where I am now. All understanding was lost and I felt like my identity was void. I stepped off the road for a moment into a room that was surrounded by a circle of mirrors, standing from the ground up. Each mirror reflecting my reflection, each reflection speaking, all reflections saying something different. As you might be able to understand, seeing multiple reflections of yourself and each one having an opinion and stating it ALL at the same time, in the same place, can be very shocking, not to mention extremely difficult. So I did what I felt was needed, I welcomed "bad luck", breaking the mirrors and shattering fear, one by one. It was my time to only hear one voice......

To be continued....

Monday, March 9, 2009


"Show me the path where I should walk, O Lord; point out the right road for me to follow. Lead me by your truth and teach me, for you are the God who saves me. All day long I put my hope in you."—Psalm 25:4-5

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Time to Say GOODBYE .

You were so bad, literally. My current thought of you, is the day you came into my life, such perfect timing, well at least that's how it seemed. I was in the process of abandoning thoughts of my past and you assisted me. You took away most thoughts of my ex, comforting me and taking me places I'd never been, some good, some bad. Early on, it was a lot of happiness, complete bondage and a unique freshness that kept us energized. We toured nearly the whole west coast together. City after city, state after state. After that time we spent in PO, I just knew you were the one for me. The only girl I didn't mind sharing either. You were cool with everybody, drawing us all in, inking memories, constant laughter and just making us feel loved. Plus, sharing you really never had an effect, because you always made me happy. However after more time spent my mind begin to get so overwhelmed and vanquished by the thoughts you'd lead me to think. I would often question your judgment and ridicule myself for even listening. The more this happened, the more I started to realize the point of your existence, how you were no longer good for me, and how you had deceived and tricked me. Immediate action had to take place, I needed to be free from you. So I did, but not for long. I remember our 1st break up, I boarded that plane, leaving a lot of the things we shared behind, neither 1 of us cried. I felt like you knew you'd be back in my life. You knew me so well, sure enough you got on a plane of your own, and three weeks later you arrived to reconcile. And even though my three weeks without you were great, I took you back anyway. And when I did, we loved hard, the whole summer, and although we had our fair share of break ups and misunderstandings during that time, you seemed to be here permanently. Which never settled with me. I knew you weren't for me, and I still can't say why I never just told you how I felt and moved on sooner. Maybe because you weren't a good listener, probably because I wasn't man enough, or it could've been I was just weak for you. Whatever it was, it carries little relevance now. I've moved on. No longer trapped by your webb's of deceit, no longer lost in my own thoughts, no longer trampled with doubt. I'm free. My destination is clear now. No more communication, no more mutual friends, no more of you bringing me up, just so I can come down even harder. You would probably be upset to know there's someone new in my life too, someone whose love is deep and whose beauty is beyond measure, someone whose grace is everlasting and holds eternal salvation in the palm of their hands. You probably know who it is by now, and I'm sure your horns have started to peak. And that's fine, be mad. Just know that this is the last time we'll talk, I've made promises and give my loyal commitment to someone better. It's time to say what I've put off for some time now, WE'RE DONE. And it's simple, the time has come, to say, GOODBYE.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

DOPEnessss !

My homie showed me this a couple days ago. Its pure dopeness.. Ryan Leslie is real, and I'll admit I wasn't up on him at first, but I must say he is more than very talented..


Wednesday, March 4, 2009


So I took the anger and frustration I had to the court. And I believe everybody in the arena knew I was playing with a chip on my shoulder, I even heard some people say, "He's playing like a man possessed!". Funny thing is, they were partially right, I was possessed. Not with a demon or an evil spirit, but simply, with an anger from within. I was so mad at her, the situation and mostly myself that I just had to find a familiar place to release the feelings that continually grew in my heart. But as it turned out, as soon the clock read 0:00, and my 57 points went down in the record books, this aggravating, irritation of anger still resided in my heart. Unfortunately I couldn't escape the frustration I held, and this hurt I felt didn't want to leave with the fans that were in the stands. I got the post game interview, signed autographs and even kissed babies, wearing a mask of happiness, but none of it was satisfying enough. I still had that vision playing in my head, over and over again. Still had that pain. When I got home, I saw my accomplishments on ESPN's Sportscenter, the analysis praising my scoring ability, defense, and impeccable free throws. But I could hardly focus on anything they were saying, it was all a blur and a bunch of murmuring. Only thing I could hear is my heart, pounding, crying. Something I don't do much, but tonight is just... Different, unquestionably different. I'm alone, no one to share dinner with, no one to feed to dessert to. I check my phone, only to see messages from my closest, mom, dad and bros. Damn, I wish she would call. Actually I don't, I tell myself I'm better without her. The long shower I took before bed reminds me of her, so I take the body wash she left to the nose and just lay back against the wall, the coldest shower I've ever taken. As I get ready for bed, I say my prayers, thanking God for my accomplishments, asking for forgiveness, for favor, and for her protection. I hit the lights and close my eyes. Ten minutes later, the phone rings. I grab the blackberry, its her. As soon as I say "Hello", I WAKE UP. Its now 6:30 am, and time to start my REAL day. And even though it was only a dream, I felt closer to it then I ever have, so as I walked out the house I had no choice but to value my smile. Dreams are funny though right? But I guess I just wasn't supposed to answer that phone! Lol.

........On my BlackBerr¥.

Monday, March 2, 2009

What About Our Soul?

Reach the highest status, acquire the most riches, that's what we're told, nice cars, dreams and jewels are what we're sold, but what about our soul?, wealth, homes, sex, all things we loathe, but once again, what about our soul?, its so easy to turn to drugs and believe there's no other way to go, grief, stuck in a reality filled with sorrow, makes me think, what about our soul?, where does our soul go?, what is the truth and how do we know? We invest so much time in love, trying to place ourselves in someone's scope, searching for a love we've yet to know, so again I ask, what about our soul?, we're sent to wonder from place to place on a rigid road, growing from young to old, setting and reaching goals, but still, what about our soul?, maybe, someday we will know, I know, I'd like to know, about my soul and where it's going to go, until then I'll just have faith, anxious to see the streets paved of gold, but I will always wonder, what about my soul?

..........On my BlackBerry¥